etiques

yes~today is the 5th day of sleepless night! for god sake... i cant sleep ever since last few weeks actually but days back i notice that i would slept at 10.30pm and automatically awaken at 2am sharp and my eyes could barely shut ever since that. even if i force my eyes to shut, my brain wouldnt~! u cant imagine how pathetic it was! even Dr. house voices lingers in my head analyzing my own problem!~(since i did the marathon house series season 4 last weekendowh!~ i was left alone that weekend so i ended up slumped on bed 24hours locked in the room watching house- house and the 4 housemens voices keep on lingering in my head, talking n discussing bout whateva symptoms appeared in me!))

but among the sleepless nights i had, tues night was fun in deed!~
we went meeting up faris a colleque who we asked for favour to keep our electrical item because of the spotcheck thingy~ we were there at the cafe waiting for him.he came and it was sharp . In a slight hesistation, but eager to know what is it like to be in the kuantan town during nightime, we agreed. and so, i and nabiilah were the only two gals that night with a bunch of very nice seniors...

nik shah sumthing...(was a really cute guy! bet a half chinese guy!) he's our driver that night. allied health fourth year student.he's charming and friendly. and the others were at first quite scarry! they're looking not that friendly but can be trusted kind of bunch.we went for a karaoke and this two boys were singging marvelousely untill shah could get himself at higher pithching for tomok's song! hehehe... but it was entertaining tho~

im not being denial saying am not crushing this guy~ hello... its typical me to "suke2" cute guys...earlier we met piran, 4th year guy who help us out with the problematic car alarm before going to the bazaar~the same thing i had now...cam suke2 ni... but indeed, its ayie who undetachable from my brain!~
SERIOUS!~ even during the chats with one of the guys, i mentioned to them about him! its like, evrywhere i go n whatever i do i never fail to remember him...its like his in evry breath of mine...chewwah!~

and yesterday i cannot sleep again!~ so i sat at the study table and go through a tack of papers... a sheet written by my own handwritting caught my attentio-SOCIOLOGY:ETHIQUES DILEMMA.

its apart of those that made me wanted to stay a lil' longer in nursing profession...
i wrote "do you really love your loved ones?then, why doubt?" as the headline.

that sheet of paper wrote about how nursing educate us not to juggle ethiques, personal issues and copping with sorts of dilemma and the approaches. yes, it was before i starts on blogging and so thousands of mind pieces written in words in testpads, books or where ever blank sheets are.

i cut it shorten here,and i'd like to share this piece of stuff i wrote on that sheet...

what would you do if you were married to your beloved one and one day you were told that he got a HIV positive? would you doubt him?

normal people would definitely thought that the husband had cheated them and went sleeping with other woman or had been wild behind their back,right?! woman-pessimistic-nature~!

however, my brill sheet of paper i read last night discussed about it as a feedback to that day lecture we had in the class.

do you know that in a way this profession teaches us the nurses to have broader perceptions and act professionals even in marriage?!

yes, we were told that we arent supposed to doubt our husband but to put trust as second thing in dealing this issue.
communication comes first!
we should sit back and talk to each other, figure out what are the possible factors causing the infection...maybe due to medical error or other reasons.we SHOULD take credits on medical knowledges we had too!~ besides, SEXUAL RELATED ACTIVITIES IS NOT HE ONLY FACTOR OF HIV CONTRACTION~!

its easy to say it out loud but hard to act it out...


in this life there are few things that means alot to me and sum of those that mean alot in my life had become reasons of me feeling down of my life, not to blame my parent, but as i decide to follow what my parent wants,i loose those things... but they're werent biggie so its okay...

i once prank ayie by asking a fren to call him, sponteneously we acted that my friend was panic not knowing what to do and that i collapse... ayie was panic!~ he really did...and im so glad knowing that!

if one day i met my ajal, please tell my parent that i breath my life because of them and that i love them and im sorry i didnt become a good daughter to them... tell my siblings that they're my strenght and weeknesses... and i love my people!